“Some people are contrarians all the time. Others only when they are right.” — Me
Elegy Written in a Country Churchyard by Thomas Gray v. Elegy Written on Gray’s Papaya by Me
Mr. Dodds and I have decided that the passing of the Almighty G.P. should not go unmourned in lines. Here are some to get you started.
In a city where hopers strive
We piece together one ninety-five
For that tithe, rewards celestial
Two dogs and drink: Recession Special
Prices rise, four ninety-five
But Gray alone keeps hope alive
While recession seemingly won’t cease
It’s Gray’s who finally lose their lease
Adrift on Sixth, now, no reprieve
Mr. Gray, we’re ready to believe.
Save that salami for army boys who slog
In tropics without magic, melons gone —
Let Sixth Avenue have, each day, a dog
Tastier, they say, than filet mignon.
“Let me have two with onion and a papaya.”
Might as well be in some Himalaya.
Morrissey’s of Manchester
Hatful of Challah
The Boy with the Quorn in His Side
Chowder than Bombs
Pretty Girls Make Maize
Sweet and Tender Rutabaga
There Is a Refrigerator Light that Never Goes Out
This Charming Pan
Girlfriend in a Korma
I Know It’s Overdone
How Soon Is Forty-Five Minutes at 350?
I Started Something I Couldn’t Finish
I Won’t Share You
Welcome to the palindrome.
So, the film The Obsession? What a missed opportunity. First of all, they cast the one white woman that no black man wants to sleep with. Second of all, come on, Idris Elba could do anything.
That said, I am currently working on a “reimagining” of this film’s premise, with some important improvements. In my version, updated for 2010, Idris Elba’s best friend is a really cool white guy who watched all of The Wire and may have a blog. Unfortunately, their fine bromance is spoiled by this wife.
Working title: Able Was I Ere I Saw Elba. Keep your fingers crossed!